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Tony Robbins – On Achievement Versus Fulfillment

“I love quotes…but, in the end, knowledge has to be converted to action or it’s worthless.” – Tony Robbins I’m very pleased to welcome Tony Robbins (@tonyrobbins) back to the show. (You can check out our previous in-dep

Published: 10.08.2016 | Description ist written by The Blog of Author Tim Ferriss

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I'm a cybernetic organism living tissue over metal endoskeleton.

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There's no downside that I can think of Hello, ladies and germs, this is Tim Ferriss and welcome to another episode of the Tim Ferriss show.

Where is my job to deconstruct world-class performers where they are from the worlds of sports investing acting military anything and everything to how to tease out the routines habits favor Book Center that you can use this particular episode is a repeat guest Tony Robbins.

And Tony of I have got to know each other over the last few years since I first had them on the podcast an epic two-parter, which is very long and very very good.

One of the most popular episodes of Haddam podcast to date.

Tony Robbins is the world's most famous performance coach for those of you who don't know the name.

He's advised everyone from Bill Clinton to Serena Williams from Leo DiCaprio to Oprah call some superhuman world leaders like Gorbachev.

It just goes on and on and in this particular episode we talked about a number of topics.

We didn't cover in the previous interview and We also drill into some New Rapid Fire questions.

So for instance, he his best investment.

He's ever made quotes.

They lose by worst advice if he hears or sees being given out regularly why he's changed his diet for the first time since he was about 17, I believe and we also go to some very specific exercises.

There's a portion in the Middle where Tony is effectively on his own.

I just let him go for a good at take 30 to 40 minutes.

And if you want a very specific exercise that you can apply in real time because he walks me through it and I dug in because I could use it today specifically was having a very rough gang called the 90 second rule and it's a process and he brings up a personal challenging experience that he had not long ago in Dallas and then walks through exactly how he contended with it and it's from roughly 1 hour and 5 minutes after this introduction ends to 1:15.

So 1:05 to 1:15, roughly we get into very nice flow and I also have to recommend Did you check out the brand new documentary out about Tony Robbins which digs into one of his events called? I am not your Guru.

You can find on Netflix.

I saw it before it came out and found it extremely powerful.

There's a good chance you will find yourself laughing and crying at different points, and I'm not much of a crier.

So that should tell you something to check it out.

I'm not your Guru on Netflix without further Ado, please enjoy this follow conversation with Tony Robbins.

Tony welcome back to the show and show me.

I want to hear your voice good to hear your voice too, and I've been thinking about you a lot and I've gathered questions as follow-ups and I've taken some from fans and part of the reason I've been asking myself about you is because I've been wondering what would Tony Robbins do in certain circumstances and finding myself in and I'll give you a perfect example today.

I'm on book deadline right now and I rolls around around 3 p.

m.

And it's just one of those days where I haven't felt like my brain has been connected to the rest of my body and I haven't really done anything.

And so I start and I'm unhooked Berry crunch book and for whatever reason words just are not really very knowledgeable on the page and that led me to want to ask you I can say a lot of my fan to ask this year.

Does Tony have bad days and if you do find yourself in a Equation like this right where you've tried the priming for whatever reason the mid-afternoon and you're like, wow, like I really don't think I've actually gotten much done today if that happens.

What what do you do? What is the internal monologue or or the self talk trying to think my way through it's not going to do squat.

Of course.

I have those days at this time.

I got a pretty good day like that.

But if I feel it happening and I catch myself up in a few hours then I I do something radical of my body to the body will change their mind the fastest and you're never you have to find that sense of energy and passion and intensity back inside yourself at univ.

What makes you go and what I would do if it was in my situation I can either do something really hot or really cold those to exchange or go for a run or go lift anything that's going to pump the blood through me by my first run would be jumping that freezing ass water that I always have here by or jump it up cryotherapy cuz I got tell you what you know you Stop your temperature down to minus 220 Fahrenheit and that you will you will have a whole new mental state.

That's pretty sure it's of it but really truly it's getting physical and some intense dramatic way that shifts the physiology and that's what's going to shift your mind.

And then the creativity comes in once I've made that shift and I'd focus on you.

No coming back to not the deadline, but to my my reasons the Y, right and then I know you do as well.

Just what the what am I doing this for what get rid of sociated.

What am I most passionate about and I won't read write speak or do anything to be read but I won't write or speak about something.

I'm not totally Posh about so if I'm not feeling good cuz my body is just thrashed.

You know, I've been burning the candle at both ends with just comment.

That's when I got to do something physical to shift it to make that happen.

Why do those two things that usually follows? I bet it would be for you two years ago.

I worked with John Denver popped in my head just now and he was stuck in every way.

I couldn't write a damn thing and he was very very frustrated and I just I'm through three of his greatest songs he'd ever done and as he walked through songs that I said, I want you to describe to me the moment they were coming through and all three of his examples.

He was either skiing Oregon a run or done something and then boom, you know, he was in the state where he was in the Flow State again, and I remember I did that for him and I start doing it for myself ever since that time and you travel you still travel with a small trampoline.

Yes, I am travel with it.

But I haven't you don't have any goodies that go that goes from place to place.

Yes.

And how do you use that? How do you typically use which most people know you have more you know, you know, you're limping your body is 4 times more limbs than there is blood the length is the detoxification system your body when you feeling tired or exhausted and lethargic, you know outside of sleep and hydration and then food, you know, it's really making sure that when system is moving so I jump on that thing for 10 12 minutes first thing in the morning and get them from moving right special if I don't have the cold nearby if I can't get in if I don't have coupons or something.

I'm in a hotel then the my next piece is to Olympic size for 12 minutes and it's just amazing.

You have to get all that lactic acid out of your body moving and you feel like a different person.

She mentioned John Denver and of course, I've seen your documentary, which is quite the buzz at the moment and we're going to talk a lot more about that.

I wanted to ask him a few fans also asked about this.

If you if you think back is there a particular intervention or that it is particularly or was particularly difficult and what made it difficult and how did you handle it my gosh that is where their characteristics that make a particular interventions difficult.

I'm about to share this with you.

We talked a few times but I had it I was it was a really big deal as my date with Destiny.

It was the first time I brought any reporters in to see this.

This is Scott 20 years ago, maybe and I always read I think you know, I read people do 10 to 20 pages of homework.

I read it all and now it takes in a couple weeks to read it all and I don't know who his name of that information is in miso.

I'm ready and I've done this and Diane Sawyer was coming with her crew to kind of just do a brief filming and show all these incredible CEO types that were changing their lives and redesigning their destiny.

It's experienced I know is on day one this one we kept trying to get my attention.

I felt the night, you know, I don't reward that right then I'm happy to do it if it's not for attention.

It's for help.

But this one when it was clear and so I ignored ignored it and all since she just exploded ignited starts at 4 her going totally berserk.

And then I saw her she was I saw the dynamic of what was going on and instantly I realized who she was.

She was a woman who had 50.

She was one of the first people with multiple personality disorders.

Mpd's they call them by the first diagnosed once in the first came up the title of this and she had been institutionalized in her story was so brutal because He actually / father have been sexually abusing her for a good portion of her life.

And she finally told somebody and he had her institutionalized people that I guess we're as friends and they there the doctor there a sexually abused tree with drug her and sexually abused her so I can only imagine Googling inside your head where there's pain no matter what your out-of-control we don't have to find a way to survive is to find a way to meet our fundamental needs for certainty for variety forgot sex when you're being trapped for feeling like you have some significant role of your life for the feeling of connection or lava grow their contribution.

These are human needs that have to be found in our life for us to feel like we can function so we can't find them good ways Upon A man that weighs on her way was to just change personalities.

That's one way to get out of pain.

If you're being viciously attacked in your out-of-control try to become someone else and she kept doing it doing it long story shortened.

She screaming to his people are people freaking out all the sudden.

She starts talking like a little girl in like an old man and I made it look like something out of Exorcist.

And the middle of all this I better just go and go and go and I finally just said to her I said, you know, I understand you're in a lot of pain and I just want you to know that I know who you are.

And I know what you've been through and then I told the room the story about you pretty well.

She stood there with a mouth opening and just gaped open and I said, so I want you to know that I I know you believe you're all these personalities I said, there's probably a reason you're here and I said, I think the reason you're here is because you know changing personalities was a brilliant solution for you to survive in those situations.

He had to keep more personalities, but you kept doing it so much now you're out of the institutions, but you're still living in pain and I said the problem is I said, you must be here because it's some level, you know of this isn't working because no one can love someone when they don't know who they're going to be next and it just grabbed her.

I found her internal need and then as I started working there she would jump back she want to control she would try to do something.

She's out of his chair.

Do you like sharks and I'll slap you across this room and then she wasn't ready for that piece.

Obviously not going to do it at the end of shock factor.

I said, I'm not some stupid psychiatrist and you know who you are deep inside and I said all the stuff was brilliant brilliant adaptation help you survive, but now it's separating you from everyone's causing you to feel the deepest pain and I said, I think it's really you have so many personalities children about the person now you say, you know, I'm Superman on Batman X Superman and Batman you can do all that stuff on your break with children and she looked at me because I am great with children and you just want you going in and out 30 an hour and a half to tell you in 2 minutes, but the bottom line in the end of the way over the edge was she goes.

Yeah, but I don't you know, she's thought I was one of the first MPGs I said, I know and they're so God damn, now, aren't they? Because I knew I knew her biggest need was to be significant.

She was defeated.

What psychiatrist she wanted to be the significant Drive needed in that more than any other drive for her on the surface what you needed more of as well.

So I said to her I use the significance Drive I said, yes so common.

I mean mpd's are a dime-a-dozen.

There's nothing unique about him at all you to see your face just drop it off and then I turn around and the cameras are rolling by the way inside my gut when this first start to like are you kidding me? This woman is splitting personality and being a freak in the middle of them filming here.

They're going to like this is who comes to Tony Robbins on full of white CEOs your Marc benioff, you know from Salesforce and in a billionaire isn't this woman is like taking away my entire Billy reach people's what bands has worked on it, but at the end of The Rolling and I said, look there.

It doesn't but I said, you know, I don't think there's ever been anyone in history that's ever had 52 personality or even to an integrated in a matter of 2 minutes or less on National Television.

But I said, I don't think you're capable of that capture and shower and I said listen, you know anyone can forget things you certainly we've all had the skill with forgetting our keys where you go from place to place to place and then you find the place you've been looking for the fifth time through I said forgetting can also be a scalp and I just helped her along the way to just let go of all those Personalities in the beauty of it.

The reason I think it was powerful was you know, they didn't do that story for a year cuz I wanted to see what happened and a year later.

She was still clear and when Diane Sawyer interview her Psychiatry said, it's just a miracle.

I can't explain it just a miracle cuz you never split again.

So is it going to be in Fairly dramatic example? But you're not gotten a call as you know, and you know present in the middle of the night saying they're going to teach me in the morning.

What should I do? If I had a chance to work with Princess Diana to help clarify what you really want to do to make with the biggest decisions in her life and and British history.

I've been I've had a ticket history about the chance to be with mr.

Garbage often and really hear what ended the Cold War directly and then sit down with him and President Bush senior at that time and meet her on and Mac Thatcher in and sit in like a fly-on-the-wall most conversations or spend some amazing times in this life that I've been privileged to witness and be a part of it sometimes influence.

Ivu is in an expert question asker crafter of questions as a way of that not manipulating us at the right word but changing thought or changing thought patterns and it if you could ask say all of the past podcast guests that I had one question.

What would that would a question be if I would never ask one question what time I was in an event that there's this woman who is suicidal and someone can I ask 267 questions before I ever said anything of that one person quotes about one person, right and she was a person that was completely shut down to the saddle non-responsive.

So I would never ask one question.

But the line of questioning would have found the person but I'm always fascinated by is what is the drive and make some of the best of who they are.

What is the uncovering? What is the piece that triggers that and I usually ask people a question like you know, who's love did you crave the most? Growing up your mother your father and she loved them both the most but whose love did you create the most to What whose love did you give the most? Are you asking me that I would say? Yeah, I would say so I had a very deep relationship with my mom and dad was I was I felt close to my dad in a lot of ways, but it was a different relationship.

Yeah.

Who did you have to be for your father? Got it.

First gut reaction without even thinking just no filters.

I had to be I had to be a good question.

man pretty rare that I get stumped on my own podcast that is our model of the world.

So I'm all the world is Gul has to have a set of beliefs or set of values a set of rules how you should be how I should be how I should be the first light doesn't always match that which is where people get stressed out thinking that all their preferences should be met but if they understand the driving force of your whole life comes because when your firstborn your wide open, you can be anything a child can do anything you can you can laugh you can call you can spank me to throw stuff.

You got a bathroom in your pants.

Try that when you're forty see if it works for the whole thing.

She could you learn from the source of love you crave the most remote sources.

Love you learn how you need to be and you'll learn it by what they tell you or what they don't tell you what you inherently makeup in your mind based upon what you witness.

So just tell me the first got response first got responses for my father I needed to be How does respect his love his love and his respect the first thing comes to mind is Maybe? Obedient is not the right adjectives but accepting of whatever his instructions were effectively and his you know of me also said I would never ask one question.

Well, I'm pretty prone to asking barrages of questions that I felt like that created a lot of that create a lot of friction.

I want I wanted to ask why a thousand times in a row before I would I would I would say yeah, I was a frequent sources of conflict when I question it or not.

Ask too many questions else.

Did you have to be What are olympiads living for this random buying myself some time? How do you dissect your mom? I think I didn't feel like I need to be anyone for my mom issues.

Very my mom.

My mom is very good at exposing me to many different things.

We did have a lot of money, but she would expose us to whether it was a particular books or say going to the beach and Gathering black sand of magnets.

Whatever might be issued exposes to a lot of different stimuli and then if we became passionate about something she would to the extent that she could be the support that and so I felt like it was very my Marching to my own drummer was perfectly acceptable and wherever I ended up as long as I was happy was was was was a perfectly fine to Destiny so to speak so I never felt like I had to be any anyone in particular for a mom.

I don't think it affects our unconscious.

So your pathway of your life of experimentation and feeling like it's not only something that is good at something that could be great.

It sounds like it's starting with those experiences with your mother your experiences of anxiety, wherever you would feel them would come from the experiences with your father cuz you couldn't win ya know I do so, both of those pieces are inside you today.

Are they not? I mean certainly know, how could they not fit right? Reclaim certain aspects that's a little deeper longer conversation, but it's like finding the pieces with your father finding an a different experience a different set of memories even of your father.

But there may be deep in your unconscious that I've been pushed away by the times that tightened you like very often.

We have an experience where we feel constricted in some way like we're not able to please the person we love at the highest level.

There's a tension that grabs in our body almost like a muscle locking up and then what happens after that trauma or that frustration or whatever you want to call that intensity that happens when your nervous system as we don't let it go and soft often times.

It just stays with us in 20-30 years later.

We don't even know why we're feeling these feelings were trying to attack it from A Million Ways often you can reclaim and he'll bat by finding the memory before that much earlier memory where perhaps your father was maybe never was go where you felt an expression of Love That was not tied to behaving in a certain way where you could actually feel that.

And there's a Liberation occurs when we find that so I'm interested in knowing what drives people because it helps you understand who they are and where it came from who helps you understand their strengths and weaknesses so you can help them.

But I'm also interested in helping people to heal those pieces that have come that where a person is adapted so much they've overuse the part of themselves like there.

I had to be in my case.

It was my mother's love that I crave died for father.

So I don't really crave them.

I didn't they weren't around mom's house.

Right right by Mother's Love and pleasing her was not an easy task and she would beat the shit out of you if she can do it.

I know I love her to death.

I'm grateful.

I am the man I am because I learned so much that adapt and I don't want people experience suffering like I experienced.

So huge part of my income for my mom.

I'm not dissing her in any way, but I had to go back and reclaim certain aspects of my life to have some real freedom in myself and knowing where that came from was very helpful.

We'll just as a side note also like the completely agree and I think that end in this is more just an observation that unique feel free to respond to be don't have two witches.

I do have those memories of Saudi bonding with my dad at a very young age that didn't didn't that weren't so predicated on any type of any of the things that we just discussed and I've tried very hard the last few years also with a lot of the the work that I've done in the world of Asians and psychedelics.

And so honest as a way of facilitating some of this very early reintegration and just self-examination and it's actually I've never been closer to my dad now, that's beautiful and I just came back from a trip to Paris with both my parents and eats.

So there's been a lot of growth as a result of looking at you.

Trying to ask myself variants of some of these questions that you're posing big focus on your past.

But this specific element of who did you need to be and who did you not need to be like we look at people that you really like a lot you're tremendous passion or appreciation for respect for invariably it's because you seeing them something that's actually in you but you decide entify with it because the source of love in your life that you were trying to please or prove to did not necessarily reinforce that form of yourself.

So you disagreeing to find this is not me.

I'm the person I need to be for my mother or my father or whoever the case may be.

So it's really useful from that standpoint so that you can begin to enrich and expand your life and it's not like you've use psychedelics is a way to kind of go back there to give me.

Obviously that way I can also be done and very simple direct ways through close to I kind of hypnotic pattern.

Can be done over a course of an hour or two like I do those in in many different events are going a day without saying.

Look who's talking about Investments for second.

But in a very Broad in a very broad sense, if you would just think of the best or most worthwhile investment you've made and what I mean by that is an investment of money time energy and I'll give you an example just because they make clarified the questions.

So Amelia Boone who's the world's most successful female obstacle course rates are for time world champion for her.

It was her first $450 which of which was a huge financial strength of the time for her first World's Toughest Mudder competition washing-up winning and it took her on this completely different life trajectory right for you.

The first one was going to a gym around 7, or I think I shared with you I have done was working for this man helping him move.

I was seventeen.

I was in high school and I was just trying to earn extra money in my family had talked about my father talked about this guy been such a loser before and then I've been so successful.

And so you know what, you're 17, I told the guy who used to be such a successful.

How come what you do? I know you didn't like it like that response at first, but he told me to the seminar by this man named Jim Rohn what's a seminar and to this man gets up and see what he's learned over, you know, 20 30 years of his life and in the evening and save you all those years.

I said, wow.

Any I said, you know, what is this happening? I told me when I said, can you get me in he said yeah, I didn't say any applicable will you know? Is a janitor I'm going to the week's pay you said well, then just go there on your own experience and waste 10 or 20 or 30.

Am I going to eat you decide? I don't wrestle for a week with that position could have seemed like such a giant decision.

But you know, I look back on it now and most important citizens my life cuz that night stimulated meet you around the camera model of what was possible to me of what I could help people out long-term and I had no direction or isn't even know if it's such a thing as a seminar in a bit like that occurred at all came out of that initial conversation.

So those damn good $35, even though it seemed like all the money I've ever seen the world face of the Earth.

Right? All these guys are self-made.

None of them are from the lucky sperm club and every single one of them as you dug in with them a different things.

I asked them about the best investments of what Warren Buffett said is best investment was going to Dale Carnegie told me said you know, it's what you do.

It's it's investing in yourself is the most important best meal ever making your life.

There's no Financial investment deliver.

Matcha, cuz if you did or skill or ability more insight or capacity, he said that's what's going to really provide economic freedom for you cuz it's so still sets that really make that happen.

So I found that most people there's different types of Investments got to start with this drug development.

You've done your whole life.

I'm working on it.

I'm working on it and I'm still a collector of quotes.

I die capture them in Evernote.

It would surprise me is how many of them are Miss attributed to people that actually originated with Jim Rohn t-shirt that this Jim had made with said don't don't wish it were easier make yourself better.

And I think that actually goes back number of people pointed out to Jim run in some bushes.

Wish you were.

Exactly.

Do you have any quotes that you live your life by or any mod any particular maxon's record constructive.

My wife is the decisions.

It's your decisions.

Not your conditions that shape your life.

And so it's in your moments of decision that your destiny is shaped.

She's going to choose really, well aren't you know, you'd make a different decision and I tell people to think about last 10 20 years your life think it's there been a decision that if you made a different decision your life would be completely different today better worse.

I don't know but completely different everybody can relate to it.

So I think most of us forget the power of decision that you know, you don't like your job change it you don't like your relationship change it change people you're going to become change it and all of us have that capacity, but it really comes down to making decisions and most people they don't make enough decisions decisions like a muscle the more you make them stronger.

Tensions in any idiot can do that in the most successful leaders are the ones that have to make decisions where they're like, we may be going to be wrong, but they figure out you're not going to make the decision to make a better decision changed the next thing and make it go.

So if they're in my life is about really how can I help people to change the structure of what creates decisions and what filters that is our beliefs or values are rules in our emotions, obviously cuz that shapes at all.

So I'm constantly looking for where is the Tipping Point that can change the quality this person's life often.

We made decisions by 10 20 years ago that still affect us today.

Some type of decisions were made as a child about life about yourself about what you believe about men or women are people a relationship or financier anyting and if we scream bleach destroy either, you know, there's no such thing as a belief that doesn't have a consequence.

The only question is is an uplifting consequence or degrading consequence.

And so I'm Q John finding what those are.

Eliminating the ones that are keeping people from making the decisions that moving forward and making that happen.

So I love quotes but it's really more about the hunt for excellence is the hunt for what's outstanding the heart just like you as long as I love you so much and respect you so much as I feel like we're different creatures but where we have some of the same course stuff in us, which is we want to understand the truth and want to bring the truth to people and we want to find that truth in all this beautiful forms in different forms of people have a variety of ways of creating the quality of life.

They desire and they deserve and we're both kind of experiment is in that area.

So to me that's that's what it's about more than the quote some self love quotes love anything.

It's inspiring of Touch by the mall, but in the end information is got to be converted knowledge got to be converted to action or it's worthless and it's in the future you say, you know, what you going to do what you're learning lead to knowledge.

You become a fool.

If you learn to learn to lead to action, you become wealthy his idea of wealthy was not just money was really rich mentally emotionally spiritually Anthony.

Of course and I I really have lived by that.

What is some of the looking at the flipside? What is some of the worst advice that you see or hear being dispensed often in say the self-improvement world or self-development World? It could be could be in any sphere but I'm just wondering if if any particularly common yet bad advice comes to mind that you think it is finished your four years of obsession on on that subject and I'm doing money Master the game and getting that out to people and still so obsessed by it is, you know, we live in a culture that you know, most people allow Financial Professionals in a 95% of which in the marketplace.

They called milk wealth managers, there's three hundred names but 95% of people are talking about as a broker and it might be a really nice person, but the advice they're going to give you Who is based on what the house is taught them to sell In The House Always Wins, these corporations are not bad.

They just they're trying to make profit for or dare, you know shareholders.

That's who they're focused on 1st.

And I focused on you so finding a fiduciary, as you know is one of the most important element somebody who is legally required to put your needs ahead of their own so many people put their money in mutual funds and you know, 96% of all mutual funds don't even match the market over 10 year period of time only 4% will match or beat it and that 4% always changing.

So if you want to get someone who can give you advice who is extraordinary, I'm actually really excited that you know, I wrote that book and then I don't need all the money and I fed a hundred billion people and I'm up eating another hundred billion this year.

I'm going to feed a billion people over the next nine years, which I'm really excited about my partnership with PD America, but in doing that in writing the book, I wanted people to not be screwed over so I spent half a million dollars by Bradley my own money and then I donated that was like the book to create this online site where people could go and then Put your number and they can find out what they actually were spending is I did, you know 1% and fees is makes up 10 years of income you lose in other words, if you paid 2% when you could have paid 1% you know 3% that have won you be paying 20 years with a future in come out just in fees for the stocks the same bonds the same investment you could have gone for the last people just don't understand this so I creep of sight and and I have people go there and I don't even pieces and instantly pull your pants down and showed you what you're really being charged and then if you wanted to the best and largest firms out there and then why would do my paper back to him? So I'm helping to just blew my mind, which was one of the guys on the site.

It's name is Peter mallouk from creative planning.

The number one rated wealth manager for the last 3 years to give you an idea and number two number one for CNBC for the last 2 years and Barons was the first one to three years.

No one's ever done it for 3 or so brilliant.

Brilliant.

Thinking out the time about 17 billion dollars and he said listen to me.

I want to sit down with you have a conversation with you because you care so much about people but there's a little gray area in the wall that some of the people you do business with are taking advantage of him.

He said I think you're going to go berserk when you find it out.

So when you realize you can delay the BBW and I met him right afterwards same day and sat down and talked and he showed me all these people that say they're producer are you saying I'm here legally required to take care of you now have this little component called dual-registration weather a broker and reproduce year that they are legally required.

They're going to tell you I'm leaving hard to take care of you in the middle of conversation gets wet hats and be a broker and sell you something that is inferior product that has no value for you and I can do it.

So I looked on every person beside but one was doing it.

I couldn't believe it either getting by with so I can knock them off the site and then I was talking to Peter and I said it's a great way to get rid of your competition and you laughed because now I'm just the facts I said no I get it.

I see you know, what one of your number 1 3 years ago and no one's ever done that he has this approach are doing their friends all have family offices where you know, you're upset or eight people with full-time or looking at your mortgage is now looking at your counting on your investment.

He will get every aspect of your life and they make it work with any of your weiner.

Now that he created a billionaire family office type format for Millionaires and I said listen if you'd be willing to do some people lose a hundred thousand and fifty thousand you won't make money on it.

I know you won't make money on it, but I want to help everybody if they don't do that.

I've been since joining forces with you.

So we spent several months together.

So now so, you know, I'm I'm pretty excited about I'm partners a Peter at creative planning on I'm never the board of directors and I'm also there had director of of psychology for their Investment Group and I'm I've now that's my focus is getting people to the right kind of person.

It's on Responsible for basically helping educate the public and of course, this is my partner in The Firm If I Grow The Firm I get more clients it helps my business is business together cuz we're together now, but I could have been with anybody.

I think this guy cuz you just a second and then she got to find the right person.

The other side of decision-making would be I think you look at help.

Oh my God, there's so many things in the health area that are so conflicted, I think you know, I just you asked me last time about my diet and I told you I got a really boring diet for now as I was for what 16 years.

I was a vegetarian and vegan and then I began eating fish and that was only 19 and I felt stronger I needed that and about three months ago.

I started I had several challenges in a row.

I had the challenge at first being four years a pounding my arms to go to with such intensity in a 50 hours in a week on on stage the nerves in my arms.

I couldn't sleep on my side.

So I slept on my back not a big deal, but the my wife keeps a hundred.

Breathing normally worried I went to a sleep study impounded I stop breathing 17 x + 16 minutes on my back.

So so they give you this face and it's extremely sexy you'll get girls with a for-sure and I'm and I'm just like are you kidding me? This is us with live my life.

And then in the middle of this I go snowboarding and I get a snowboarding accident.

I tripped out three of my rotator cuff and handling paint.

It wasn't that big a deal but then the pain starts going down my arm and I find this incredible level of pain is nine9 a man.

I can handle pain but it's it was as severe as anything that couldn't sleep.

Even when the hospital for the MRI and found out I have spinal stenosis with a nerves are being pinched and spine is taking up and me are they tell me? I can't snowboard again.

I can't play Squash.

I can't you know, I can't jump around on stage me crazy.

And so I wasn't one except that so long story short.

I'm telling you this because I have a core belief.

The core belief is he asked me about quotes a leaf life.

Always happening for us not to us and it's our job to find out where the benefit is if we do, I just magnificent.

So I'm trying to find some benefit and not sleeping not having pain having a vacuum cleaner on my face and just and I and I won't give up and I was going to tell me my life is over, right and in the midst of all this I'm also experiencing something insane that ain't on my wife doesn't want to worry about my only 56 years old and I've never I'm onstage 50 hours, you know, and don't forget a thing that is like my brain is just it's a strength and I'm on stage and I'm trying to figure out all the sudden.

What did I just say it? Why do they say it was like dementia, and I'm so that's freaking me out all this is happening at once while I just maybe six months before made this decision that said I am going to become a master of joy and happiness.

Like I never have before as great as I think my life is I'm going to end suffering as it arrives.

I'm going to realize that there's only two places you can live Beautiful states of being joy happy.

Fashion, you know decisiveness creativity or all those states that when you're in those emotional states wife is magnificent, you treat yourself and others at the highest level and then there is suffering States and none of us who were cheevers would probably called suffering just likes the cheevers and never fear folder just stressed same thing.

So I never called suffering if you would said do you have a are you suffering with his wife in the world of freedom, but I did suffer cuz suffering really is any emotion that takes you out of those beautiful snakes so would be I get frustrated I get stressed I get concerned I get overwhelmed I get all kinds of feeling didn't last very long, but that's part of life.

But really what happened for me is and you talk about better advice.

Advice I gave myself if I say I got I went to India spend some time with a friend of mine and came out of it and said the next level for me is realizing how to experience life at the highest level everyday every moment finding ecstasy and joy in this moment with you and Mom with my wife in the moment when I'm going to go talk with someone.

I mean billionaires are common someone who's truly happy every moment of life is not and so my and I can talk about the advice or Direction my whole Obsession became to say look my whole life is about helping people create an extraordinary quality of life.

Not a good one.

Not even a great one just life on their terms.

Whatever that is some people that's three beautiful children some people that's a garden some people that's poetry some people at the building a billion-dollar business.

There's no right or wrong, but whenever you really want To get it you got a master 2 skills on the one everybody knows is the science of achievement.

Like we've got to figure out how to take our visions and make a real people to do that are the people that everybody knows the name of and respect have the wife the way they want it seemingly and it is a science in that achievement There are rules if you wanted to finance their rules to buy you some money you break those rules on a girl who you are going to financial stress same thing of the body.

You can have low energy and disease if you are wine with them you're going to high energy so that's science of achieving you and I could dig into that forever.

But the one I'm passionate about the one I really want to jump on this this call if you want cuz I really want to spread the word is two things.

It's this idea that the other skill you need that is so boring in our culture does not reinforce.

It does not show its true importance is the art of fulfillment and it's a And it's not a science cuz what's going to wake you up.

You are good friends.

What likes me up there going to be a lot of things in common to be some things that are different.

There's a woman in your life.

She's going to love certain things and things are going to be cited by the dogs at you.

That's just part of life.

I was with Steve and I think you know Steve's a dear friend of mine from the most of Las Vegas and Macau and I had he calls me up one day is perfect.

And he says to me this is where are you in the world by Simon Sun Valley we both have some Escape homes in Sun Valley because he was going to call you cuz we don't need to call me on your go see me 17 years and he said I just outbid everyone your father before it and he's a Tony you got to see if it's incredible.

I paid 2 million dollars for this picture and I'm like, oh my God, I've seen some of his Picasso's are amazing is he he's got he's got everything you can imagine Rembrandt.

And so I said, okay, I can't wait to see it.

So I'm driving in my mind.

And what is this is going to be incredible if I walk in his house and I look up and it's a big red square.

I mean square with a little bit of orange in it, right and I look at this is Steve, you know, I first admired it so you don't give me a hundred bucks in 15 minutes.

I could do this shit.

I'm telling it like that goes, you know, you understand the guy committed suicide while he committed suicide a trillion dollars of value in that pain and I respect him cuz I don't like he knows each brush stroke and what it means the what went into it and what the tablet is.

I don't have that level of sophistication around that kind of Arts.

Kygo Red Square.

He looks at it and goes 82 million dollars in the valley.

That's how humans function so you and I have to figure out what it is that really likes us up because success without fulfillment to me as the ultimate failure life the worst advice you can get his goat cheese while your goal most people do that and I go is this all there is what you have to find out is what's going to fill you and there are no it's not like a science because it's different every but you want to know what's I'm up here in DC right.

Now.

I'm looking out of the forest and you look at this Forest wonder what God love the universe loves.

It's pretty obvious.

Nothing's the same.

It's all about what's real the principle that makes you feel like the film is you got to grow anybody.

I don't care how much money they have how many Academy Award they have hunting people that like that doesn't matter.

What the hell it's never enough if you don't keep going cuz if you don't grow you dye your business not growing don't bullshit yourself in shrinking if your relationship is not growing it is Can you design there is no in between in real life of how things really well and if you grow the reason I believe growth is imperative in the universe.

My rules.

Everything is because it gives us something to give and I really believe that's what we're made for where most alive when we don't just do something for ourselves, but really feel like our life matters cuz it extends Beyond ourselves in the contribution.

So I'll give you a perfect example example of the world because it just so relevant and I also wanted to test how people responded so during these premiers of I'm not your Guru around the country.

I'm going about the rich McHugh and and then I asked people as well as in my seminars around the world say how many of you guys said we've lost a national treasure in the United States two years ago Donna brazile up in Toronto in America.

I said, his name was Robin Williams.

How many of you in this room donation? If you liked Robin Williams radio interview love Robin Williams And many others in Beijing in Tokyo over the world are assholes didn't like it.

But the truth is you back me everybody going to the Hollywood Big Dreams.

Everybody tells you you're full of shit.

This guy did he want his own TV show we did it.

Do you want to have the most beautiful family and he did it and he said he want to make more money than you can spend and he achieved it and he said this is not enough.

I want to make movies not just TV and he did that but I'm not being funny is number one skill me did it.

He said he want to make the whole world laughing you did it.

You want to get the whole world 11 and he did it himself hung himself in his own home.

Leaving hundreds of millions of people around the world with love this man and screw us.

He left his children and his wife scarred for life.

He was a good man.

How do you explain that? I'll tell you explained it the worst advice a person ever got someone got stuck in his psychology that achievement was more important than the biggest fucking lie on the planet if you get it, if you wake up to it, you can actually have a wife that is so rich and so beautiful, but the only way you can do it if you got understand this brain inside.

Our heads is a 2 million year old brain and its 2 million year old brain was not designed to make you happy with design and make you survive and it's ancient old survival software that is running you a good deal of time.

Whenever you're suffering that survival software is there and the reason you're suffering as you're focused on yourself, you're obsessing on yourself people tell me I'm not suffering that way if I'm worried about my kids are not what they need to be.

Now the reason they're upset if they feel like the older kids.

It's about them still.

In fact, I begin to uncover.

We're all suffering comes from it down in a simple little tools I dug in Suffering comes from three patterns wasp less never if you are in a situation where you believe that someone did something the government your friend your coworker said whoever and because they did that you lost love are you lost an opportunity or you lost respect or you lost anyting the illusion of loss is the place we suffer interview unconsciously even with my conscience because we're obsessing about herself.

We're having this illusion that something happening.

Now life is we expected to be is not there and I expect a patient's are worth keeping us with the happiness on the other hand.

The other one is less.

If you did something I did something you failed to do something is my friend.

I failed to do something for you and as a result of either of us starts thinking we have less respect Les Schwab West Jordan West Liberty West something you're going to suffer you going to come up with those emotions that make you crazy.

And the worst one is when you start thinking because you did this or I did this or you didn't do that.

I didn't dislike.

Somebody did something because of that we will never have something again.

Then people get crazy inside and the antidote to that suffering is appreciation.

It's getting outside of yourself and finding something to appreciate cuz we get so upset about stuff today.

It's not that I'm going to give you a perfect example enough now to have a little chat right go straight to China 9 stop.

It's unbelievable prep without the stage my life my whole life iPhone commercial and I get on Qantas airlines to go to Australia at 14 hours, you know the drill and that when I be is like he's now 12 of them to actively managed.

We got 1200 employees on three continents and seven Industries.

Will you 5 billion in sales? Plus this year combined with all these people are going on I get on that plane in my brain be like, oh my God.

I'ma be disconnected for 14 hours.

What stressful about sitting or lying down? The stories we tell ourselves that stresses out but I'm this flight like, you know, you're used to know domestically that access to you don't have to thank God you got connections Facebook and Instagram.

Forbidden to be a part of metric units in your emails and I get on the plane is like being nails for the first time we have Internet until I swear to God it was like God into people stood up actually stood up and clapped and I have to admit I didn't stand up and clap but I was doing that inside by all.

Yeah, this is so cool.

And then what do you think happens to peanuts later internet? The internet is it is announced to not be working for how long I've no idea.

1.

18 minutes earlier.

It was a miracle now.

It's already an expectation.

You want to change your life you want to end suffering stop just focusing easy to cheat when you're fulfilled.

Anyway, you feel better actually trade your expectations for appreciation in your whole life changes in a moment to deal with to realize if I was going to take a different level of life life is too short to suffer and it took me two separate him.

I would call suffering chances are if you're listening right now.

Are you dumb or chances are with 1200, please across all these industries multiple continents.

What are the chances that someone is stepping up something right now.

It's 100% And I buy my phone nearby.

There's going to be a text or an email or a slack or something to let me know that and I'm going to go from this beautiful state.

I've been to Are you kidding me? And that would be my life and I realized that my happiness was so cheap.

I get my happiness over somebody not doing what I thought they should do and the more people that you're them responsible to and for the more likely he'll just the law of averages says if not going to work out the way you expect and so I finally decided I got a number one in this is my invitation.

What's why I came on cuz I'm so passionate about this.

You can tell this my whole life had my work my ass off for it.

I've been blessed both but out of all of that nothing compares the last year-and-a-half of my wife and I both made this distinction and said, there's only two state you live in beautiful state your suffering States and life is too short to supper.

So when we start the supper, we have a 90 second rule feel it for 90 seconds figured out let it go because all these things were so upset at my preference.

Is that everybody would do think it's a certain way my preferences.

I have the internet on the plane.

We all have these preferences that we make life-and-death.

It's like this survival mechanism in our brain is always looking for what's wrong.

That's what it does at the survival mechanisms looking for a strong so you can fight or flight it but there's no longer a saber-tooth tiger to avoid.

So now that worries about what are people thinking of me or do I have enough money in a country where you live in poverty in the United States, you're actually in the one percent of the world people say they're in the 99 percentile.

I have $2.

50 a day nine hundred bucks a year.

So I don't know anybody be in poverty anywhere but we live in a world where most of us are looking for what's wrong what's wrong is always available so is what's right, and if you don't take control of your focus everything in your life will disappear.

So we have is 90 second rule.

And if you want later on the show here we can I can do other process there buddy for 2 minutes and show him how to end some suffering as it occurs.

Now the suffering will show up again.

And is always looking for what's wrong and so it shows up as not like it won't show up as you kill it.

We still people killed a monster while it's a baby don't wait till it's Godzilla eating the city, whatever you want to kill it right away.

So in the beginning it should have probably been a 4 hour rule quite honestly, but years ago, I would have been 4 months of upset and so forth, but we really got it down like a muscle to 90 seconds and I cannot tell you the level of magnificence and joy and happiness you have when you don't stress out about all the stuff that you can't control the chest a preference and you find the beauty in everything and you use with wife is offering you I'm going to always done this it just it's like everything else you can manage something.

You don't measure right and I wasn't measuring this cuz I just called he's other emotions.

They weren't dominant.

They were destroying my life.

You're just showing of the times I called that life.

No, that's not life at survival software.

That's an old brain and I teach my brain what to do I do.

My brain, I don't have an argument.

I don't have negotiations in my mind.

I train my brain to condition your do this and now this year I've trained it to just let go and find what is beautiful in each moment.

And there's nothing on Earth that experience has brought more joy need.

My wife is also when you're doing that during the different place.

You're not you can't be present with someone when you're stressed out inside and if there's really a problem when your in a beautiful state of being with all your bullshit, I can tell you you might look like you're getting better, but you really try being in the ultimate beautiful States and solving something and see how much faster it'll be.

So I am on a journey to invite people to make the most important decision of their life, which is deciding to ends up deciding live in a beautiful state.

That's my spiritual vision.

Now, my friend is named Christian India said, you know What's your spiritual vision? That's how this conversation started.

He said the live in a beautiful state all day long everyday, that's my entire place.

Cuz if I do that everything else comes to it and I thought what would cause someone to kill men women and children and you know, I like you scene happened in Paris and what happened in nice recently What's happen? Obviously in in Orlando in San Bernardino, and I said, I can't tell you the kind of person to do what I tell you didn't do it happy person didn't go kill all those people.

I feel human being a person of the beautiful state does not clot or try to harm anybody much this kill anybody.

Person a beautiful state is not out there trying to you know steel from somebody else if you don't need an airplane, and and the first thing they say is if you have a problem and we lose oxygen masks drop it down and put it on your child first, right? No discipline yourself further seems selfish with your child to take care of a kid first, but the reason is if you don't take care of yourself and have nothing for that child a child's going to die to putting yourself in a beautiful state is putting that Living oxygen inside of you and then you are things to give other people as long as you're suffering suffering but gets more suffering.

So I always tell people figure out what your favorite flavor of suffering is not all the time.

Is it anxiety? Is it worry? Is it anger is it pissed off? Is it going to try to please everyone is your favorite style of suffering and it cuz when you in that there's a ton of money will give you no matter of Louisville give it to them and of accolades Awards, none of that.

Should I get the call from all those multi-billionaire clients from all those people in the entertainment business who got everything in the miserable and they bring me into helping with their business or whatever it is.

And I'm the Trojan Horse I give them what they want.

But I know what I'm really there for is also give them what they need and help them to find that joint happened.

So I've been doing that you don't like managing coaching Paul Tudor Jones on the top 10 financial traders in the history of the world in a guy in 1987 when stock market took it the biggest percentage drop ever percentage-wise still the most Pre-made 20% for his clients and they lost money but I've been coaching him now for 22 years.

He hasn't lost money in 22 years.

So I'm doing my job but it also making sure that man is fulfilled and that to me is my real Mission with him, even though I'm helping them on the business side in a way that he's very pleased with making sure of his life was fulfilled is my ultimate ultimate drive.

So I finished I just think why do people say God's not really in my life.

I don't know.

There's a God or an infinite energy or whatever you want to call when you think is created you and I was hitting people in your imagine if you were you were the Creator and you come here to one of your creations and you say to this person Joe how you like what I created for you and mrs.

G's God.

I mean, it's hot as shit here at 70° man.

You got me stupid people.

I got to deal with all the time.

They're always getting in my way.

And you know, it won't have to work for a living and plus you got these little red ants and title a flea bite my ass.

I want you creepy's annoying Aunt if your God you want to hang out with this person.

And if you're human you want to hang out with him to go to somebody else you say, how's it going? The other guy says hey Matt.

This is so incredibly beautiful place.

I could ever imagine the sky near the water.

I'm I got there so many different people to challenge me and help me to grow and learn people robbing.

Please red ants, I mean, he's ready answers.

So tiny on a thousand times their size are so crazy even bite me at school.

You graduated here.

What do you want to hang with? So why do gado gado my life? It's probably cuz you whining bitch too much to feel God's presence, right? We have got to stop the suffering.

I don't know many people that don't suffer regular they don't call it suffering, but that's what they do and it's something you can end not like one time.

It's like drama Line in the Sand and say if I want to take the island burn the boats.

I'm not going back and then committing yourself to it and not beating yourself up.

Like, I don't know you're suffering and you need to change.

We have a 90 second.

I don't know if I can do to help.

We do our own internal work.

But if she suffered for whatever.

Of time internally on there for her, but I'm not going to make her wrong for it.

Cuz what happens is your brain starts to see how life can really be and is more beautiful than most humans will ever dream up.

It's the most people try to drink or smoke or do something to alter their state to get in a beautiful state and I'm telling you can buy yourself to be that way.

So this is my little poopy Thank You for Smoking out cuz you're such a gem chimp.

Let me do it, but it's just like if I can get every human being to truly make the decision keep the word and keep practicing cuz it's a beauty practice cuz I still feel nothing shows up and you see it you let it go but if you do it more and more like like I said if I can muscle there is a level of joy as much as you ever dreamed you have I'm telling you there's a hundred fold out there and I'm inviting your listeners to consider trying a real simple 10 day challenge day for 10 days.

I'm just not going to suffer.

I'm a ninja.

I'm going to let it go realize don't sweat the small stuff.

It's all small stuff.

Stop obsessing about myself.

I'm going to focus on what I can appreciate what beautiful and just try and see what happens the end of ten days.

You really believe it's the most important thing a wife like I do then you commit to that decision long-term and maybe six rounds of your friends and family sharing why you've done it.

So you got some leverage on yourself and you keep moving forward and keep expanding and for people who I'm going to take you up on what you said a little bit earlier just in terms of describing how the 90 second rule Works in practice.

I think a lot of people listening would want to take you up on the challenge in to have the 90 second rule processing their Phuket as part of that.

What what is it? What does it look like when you give us an example of what that might look like? Okay, sample, rather use it recently.

I was in Dallas.

I don't know 3-4 weeks ago and I was getting an early start with an event we had about 7,500 people that 8000 people there and we went to the fire walk with no different than a far walk I've ever done in 35 years.

We always have no quarter from 1% of half of 1% under 1% of people that have hot spots and blisters.

They know they could get an advance look like going to go do a marathon, you know, you could get blisters and if you do you don't quit you push through it.

It's a Badge of Courage and you're proud of yourself, right? You know the fire Wok.

That's what it is is an experience of someone overcoming your fear that something real to take action in spite of it and you know the recent exposure some danger if you want to call them and they take care of people making like it's no big deal but is not a big deal and years ago in San Jose where somebody was driving by and saw some people coming out.

911 said there's all these people burning here and it became the story overnight that all these people with burned at the Spire walk.

It went around the world in the new cycle.

The 24/7 news cycle of people don't have you don't send me just copy the same story the same thing over and over again.

They said people hospit